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Tumblr "You Tried" Star for Not Sucking in Expected Ways While Still Sucking: Haywire

Most Disturbing Unintentional Horror Film: Ruby Sparks

Most Amazing Scene in a Severely Lacking Movie: tie between The Hobbit (riddles in the dark) and Les Miserables (I Dreamed a Dream)

Best Teen Ensemble Acting: The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Most Unfairly Maligned Fun Popcorn Film: John Carter (of Mars)

Most Powerful Suspense Despite Such Little Character Development: Zero Dark Thirty

Best Bearded Men Ensemble Acting: Lincoln

Best Marathon of the Best TV Show that Barely Qualifies as a Movie: Madoka Magica The Movie Parts 1 and 2

Futurama Award for Witty Philosophical Dilemmas with Creative Bullshit Non-Answers: Wreck-It Ralph

Most Unexpectedly Perfect Casting (Jack Black): Bernie

Best (unfortunately only) Documentary I Saw But Didn't Review Because Doc Reviews are Hard Especially When the Leads are so Hate-able: The Queen of Versailles

Best Subversive Stop-Motion to Rile Up Creationists: The Pirates! in an Adventure with Scientists

Best Ass-Kickings I Didn't Review Because the Painful Dubbing Made it Hard to Fully Embrace: The Raid: Redeemption

Best Oscar-Nominated CIA-in-the-Middle-East Based-on-a-True-Story Thanks to a Sense of Fun and Character: Argo

Wes Anderson Award for Being Wes Anderson at His Most Enjoyably Wes Anderson-iness: Moonrise Kingdom

Best Hair/Best Mother-Daughter Story: Brave

Best Archery/Most Worthy of Gratitude that an Actual Smart Feminist Story is in the Spotlight Once Occupied by that Twilight Crap: The Hunger Games

Best Cinematography (Digital)/Best Bond Movie I Didn't Review Because Not Really Knowing Bond the Attempts at Continuity Really Made No Sense: Skyfall

Best Subversive Stop-Motion to Rile Up Homophobes/Best Antagonist Who's Not Really a Villain/Best "It Gets Better" Video with Zombies: Paranorman

Best Actor (Joaquin Phoenix)/Best Cinematography (Traditional)/Most Enjoyable Puzzle to Ponder: The Master

Best 3D/Best Effects/Most Amazing Single Hour of Any Movie This Year Sadly Bogged Down by that Ending Leaving Us with a Puzzle Less Fun to Ponder: Life of Pi

Best Editing/Most Overlooked Movie of the Year/Most Movie of the Year: Cloud Atlas

Best Subversive Stop-Motion to Rile Up Science-Hating Fundamentalists in General/Best Dog/Best Tim Burton Movie in A Long Time: Frankenweenie

Best Argument in Favor of Making More Traditional Animation/Best Treatise on Our Inevitable Mortality (you know, for kids!)/Most Annoying Release Since Disney Made it Ineligible for a Best Animated Feature Oscar: The Secret World of Arrietty

Best Anne Hathaway Performance (and remember, she already earned her other movie its award here)/Best Reflection on Important Political Issues Using Superheroes/Best Sequel That I Imagine People Would Love Even More if it Wasn't Standing in the Shadow of Heath Ledger: The Dark Knight Rises

Best Argument in Favor of Legalizing Pot/Best Monster Menagerie/Movie I've Rewatched the Most and if Anything it's Gotten Better: The Cabin in the Woods

Best Experience in a Movie Theater/Best Smashing/Best Line I Missed Because Everyone Was Laughing Too Hard to Hear It ("Puny god"): The Avengers

Most Fascinating Villain That's Also the Most Sam Jackson's Had to Act Since Forever/Most Disturbing Violence/Most Awesome Violence/Best Epic Mythmaking: Django Unchained

Best Time Travel/Best Reasoning Not to Talk About Time Travel/Best Original Screenplay/Most "Holy shit!" SPOILER ALERT: Looper

Best Actress (Quvenzhane Wallis)/Best Adapted Screenplay/Best Score/Most Tears Shed/Most Promising New Director/Best Pigs/Movie Scientists In the Future Will Watch/Favorite Movie of the Year: Beasts of the Southern Wild

And my top 10 (or 11) most Anticipated Movies of the Next Year:
10. From Up on Poppy Hill's wide release and/or the next Miyazaki film if we see its release here this year
9. Iron Man 3
8. Thor: The Dark World
7. Much Ado About Nothing
6. Kick-Ass 2
5. Elysium
4. The World's End
3. Wolf Children
2. Star Trek Into Darkness
1. Pacific Rim



( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
Mar. 18th, 2013 04:23 am (UTC)
I'm also looking forward to see Pacific Rim. It's Gundams vs Godzilla!
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )



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